Wednesday, 2 February 2022

 

LONELINESS 

 As I write this message it is the first day of a new month and so is a suitable time to start a new 

programme. I intend, subject to God’s blessing, to publish each week two messages, one for midweek 

on a social issue, and the like with a purely biblical message at week-ends.  I hope and pray they will 

help, and will be pleased to receive any comments if anyone wishes to make.

For this first social issue, I have taken the subject of loneliness which causes illness and other problems, and a great deal of unhappiness with mental breakdown, with medication becoming necessary.

For this first social issue, I have taken the subject of loneliness which causes illness and other problems, and a great deal of unhappiness with mental breakdown, with medication becoming necessary.

Loneliness happens in varying degrees, much depending on why one is lonely.  A temporary absence of friends,  illness, fear of going out.   At the present time loneliness has become very prevalent, with the pandemic forcing man people, especially the older age groups, to remain in their homes for months to avoid catching the virus. I know the medical profession has had to deal with a rising number of people incurring mental disturbance because of living alone.

It was never God’s intention for people to have to face loneliness.  The Bible has shown how  important it is for people to be with another; separations and being out of touch with people was to be avoided.

 In the creation story, God said after creating man, that it was not good for man to be alone, so he created woman to be his companion, so making the perfect partnership.

In Hebrews, the writer called for Christians to be with each other, and the well-known saying became well known, ‘no man is an island’.  Dwight L Moody, a famous American preacher, encouraging a young man to be with other Christians, used an illustration of a piece of coal falling from a fire and dropping on a stone plate, where it stopped burning.  People can burn out if left for long period.

A most regular cause is after the loss of a wife or husband, when you are left in isolation, with a feeling of solitary confinement, where every minute seems like an hour. When two people commit their lives to each other at a young age, and live with dependence on each other for many years, the loss cannot fully be described.  We all know life has to end, but no one can anticipate the profound feeling and effect on the remaining partner.

 No words can adequately describe what it is like, half of one’s own life goes too;  the loss of any family members can be greatly felt, but none I believe can equate with the loss of a wife or husband if the initial love is still existing.  My experience as a Minister, is that women usually face the loss  better than men, but may have more hardship in daily life, as often there is financial loss is greater.

I cannot imagine the feeling of divorcees, when the separation involves a breaking of vows, and you know the other partner is alive, but you are deprived of their presence. There must surely be feelings of betrayal and desertion, and in such cases women are the more likely to feel the effect in middle class families. The words of Henry Ford, the motor magnate, are so wise.  Asked how he managed to have such a long and happy marriage, he is quoted as saying, like with a car, keep the same model.

Yet again, men are more prone to wander away, and even in equally faulty circumstances, the wife  is left to fend on her own with reduced finance, sense of betrayal, and coping with the children.

Young people becoming University students and leaving the protection and comfort of living with a family to go and live alone,  problems arise when sometimes dubious circumstances arise in a city distant from their own. I have seen my own children and grandchildren having to live in student accommodation which was so different from home. In one case the accommodation was deplorable, made worse perhaps by the fact that some young people are not use to cleanliness and hygiene, and if prisoners were housed in public prisons of similar type, there would be an outrage. 

Problems arise when in desperation of loneliness and new environment, they are vulnerable to the vultures tempting them with drugs, alcohol, and unfitting sexual contacts.

Whatever the cause of loneliness, Christians can get encouragement from knowing they can call on God who stated, ‘I will never leave nor forsake you’.  He promised would not leave anyone who called on him, because of the death of Jesus on the Cross, who in that loneliness died to gain forgiveness for us, and so made us righteous in God’s sight to  give us salvation.

Remember too, the long list of people in the Bible from Abraham, the prophets, David the king of Israel, to Paul who spent time of loneliness in a Roman prisone, which he eloquently expressed in his very last Letter to Timothy before being executed; to Peter and other Apostles. 

Most of all to Jesus, who stood alone on the Cross for you and me, even calling out to God as he faced the walk to the Cross, but was ready to obey God and continued to do what God had planned.

There are numerous things you can do to ease feelings of distress in your loneliness. You can keep a loving photo of that lost wife or husband, and think what you would say if he/she was there.  Keep a chair or a favourite possession nearby, and think of all the happy times. People will tell you things will get better as time goes on, but don’t be sure of that.

True love will no fade, but you need to get involved in some activity.  Visit your local Church where you will make friends. You can always ask God to help you.

There was a well known song, sung by Bing Crosby,at a time when singers had nice voices,and the songs had meaning, it was called ‘true love’ .  I close with two verses.

While I give to you and you give to me           For you and I have a guardian angel
 True love, true love.                                      On high with nothing to do

So on and on it will always be                       But to give to you and to give to me                                         

True love, true love                                        Love, for ever true

Having spent a life-time dealing with people, and facing reality, the words fidelity, loyalty, trust, love, and tolerance, have I know to a great extent, a very great extent, lost their traditional meaning. What makes it worse, is that people are not feeling any guilt.

 

PRAYER

Lord Jesus, the world is full of lonely people who are weary and burdened, alone and afflicted. Be gracious to each hurting soul. I ask that many would find their comfort and succour in You, Who came to earth to carry our burdens, heal our brokenness, and set us free from life’s bondage. Thank You, that You have promised to give Your precious rest and perfect peace to all who look to You.

 Fulfil Your many promises to those that are lonely and afflicted. Set the lonely in families free as You have promised if others forsake us, You will never ever leave us nor forsake us. Thank You for the many precious promises that are specially for those that are lonely, and I pray that You would meet each one at their very point of need. I ask this in Jesus' name,

 

Amen.

May God bless his Word to us, and may his Holy Name be praised.

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